Musicismylife4ever's Blog

Chapter 5: Lucky Lovely

“FRIENDS?!”

She said in disbelief like it was the craziest thing she’d ever heard.

Then she looked at me.

“Who the hell are you guys? Well, I know you Kim.”

She said rolling her eyes. Apparently she didn’t like her.

“Yeah up yours too Barbie.”

Kim said with a smile.

“You loser. But who is this other whore.”

“Whore?”

I repeated.

“Did I stutter?”

“Okay you don’t even know me bitch so don’t start running your mouth you flat chested, ugly ass, girl who only gets guys cause you’re an easy fuck, slut.”

Her mouth dropped to the floor. That wasn’t really how I was but that felt good.

“Aw, dick got your tongue?”

Kim smiled.

Britney stomped her foot and then walked away fast. But before she did she looked at me.

“You’ll regret that.”

“No, I won’t.”

I said with a smirk.

And then she left, I felt so superior.

“Wow.”

Ryan said looking at me in amazement.

“What?”

“No girl, well besides Kim has stood up to Britney.”

“Well she had it coming to her.”

“Do you guys still want to hang out?”

I looked at Kim, she nodded.

“Let’s do it.”

Ryan’s Point Of View

Wow, Megan was something, something irresistible. I don’t know what it was about her but something deep down inside me felt there was something about her that wasn’t, well, normal. But hopefully I would be able to figure it out sooner or later. The guys were just staring at us as we approached them.

“Hey guys this is Megan and you all know Kim.”

“Hey.”

They all said in sync.

“Hi.”

Megan and Kim said.

“So what do you guys do for fun?”

Kim said crossing her arms.

“Well usually we’re rehearsing in the band room.”

“Oh are you guys any good? Do you mind if we hear you play?”

Megan said with a smile.

“Sure.”

I said smiling back.

Spencer’s Point Of View

As we were walking back to the band room no one really talked. I kept glancing at Megan and Ryan who kept looking at each other and smiling but not even saying a friggen word. That got annoying so fast. I mean it was cute but I wasn’t sure how this would all turn out in the end between them. I mean Megan seemed like a really nice girl for Ryan but I wasn’t sure if this would take up all of Ryan’s time and focus.

“Why don’t you girls sit here?”

I said pointing to some chairs next to the staging area.

“Thanks.”

Megan said smiling.

They sat down as we set up everything.

“How many songs do you guys have?”

Kim asked folding her hands on her legs.

“Well right now we just have 1 full song but we have some others that just have bits and pieces.”

Brendon said fixing the microphone.

“Okay this song goes out to the gorgeous ladies in the front row.”

Brendon said smiling; he was always such a flirt. This song is called “Camisado”

The I.V. and your hospital bed
This was no accident
This was a therapeutic chain of events

This is the scent of dead skin on a linoleum floor
This is the scent of quarantine wings in a hospital
It's not so pleasant
And it's not so conventional
It sure as hell ain't normal
But we deal, we deal

The anesthetic never set in and I'm wondering where
The apathy and urgency is that I thought I phoned in
It's not so pleasant.
And it's not so conventional
It sure as hell ain't normal
But we deal, we deal

Just sit back, just sit back
Just sit back and relax
Just sit back, just sit back
Just sit back and relapse again

Can't take the kid from the fight
take the fight from the kid
Sit back, relax
Sit back, relapse again
Can't take the kid from the fight
take the fight from the kid
Just sit back, just sit back

You're a regular decorated emergency
You're a regular decorated emergency

This is the scent of dead skin on a linoleum floor
This is the scent of quarantine wings in a hospital
It's not so pleasant.
And it's not so conventional
It sure as hell ain't normal
But we deal, we deal

The anesthetic never set in and I'm wondering where
The apathy and urgency is that I thought I phoned in
It's not so pleasant.
And it's not so conventional
It sure as hell ain't normal
But we deal, we deal

Can't take the kid from the fight
take the fight from the kid
Sit back, relax
Sit back, relapse again
Can't take the kid from the fight
take the fight from the kid
Just sit back, just sit back
Sit back, sit back, relax, relapse
Sit back, sit back, bababada
You can take the kid out of the fight

You're a regular decorated emergency
The bruises and contusions will remind me what you did when you wake
You've earned a place atop the ICU's hall of fame
The camera caught you causing a commotion on the gurney again

You're a regular decorated emergency
The bruises and contusions will remind me what you did when you wake
You've earned a place atop the ICU's hall of fame
The camera caught you causing a commotion on the gurney again

Can't take the kid from the fight
take the fight from the kid
Sit back, relax
Sit back, relapse again
Can't take the kid from the fight
take the fight from the kid
Just sit back, just sit back
Sit back, sit back, relax, relapse
Sit back, sit back, bababada
You can take the kid out of the fight

The I.V. and your hospital bed
This was no accident
This was a therapeutic chain of events

Megan’s Point Of View

I thought they would be an okay band but they sounded, amazing.

 “Wow. Who wrote this song?” I said looking at them.

 “Ryan did, he’s written all the songs.” Brendon said giving him a slap on the back.

 “I agree with the wow, it was really good.” Kim said smiling. “But you don’t have a name yet?”

 “Nah, we take one step at a time.” Jon said looking at the stain on the bottom of his shirt.

 “Well wouldn’t a band name be the first step?” Kim asked raising an eyebrow.

 “No, we decided to go with songs.” Jon said starting to get a little bit annoyed with Kim’s rebuttals.

 “Well I mean a band name is easier to make than a whole song.” Kim said walking over to Jon.

 “No it isn’t, we’ve finished plenty of songs.” Jon said walking closer to Kim.

 “I know, I never said you didn’t. But, what I am saying is that if you tried you’d have a band name already.” Kim said with a smile screaming, “Yea, I know I’m right.”

While they were arguing I decided to ask a question that was on my mind. I soon found out that it wasn’t a good idea.

 “Why did you decide to write this song? Like what made you create this song?”

And then, the room fell quiet. Everyone looked at me like I was crazy, well everyone except Kim that was. She looked at confused as I was. Then the bell rang, I was relieved at that moment.

 “We should get to class.” Spencer said.

They put away their stuff and walked out the door, it was just Kim, Ryan, and I in the room. Ryan looked at me; he looked upset and then put a smile on. I knew it was fake; I was always good at finding out others emotions.

“I can walk you guys to class if you want?” Ryan asked kindly.

“Actually I’m going to go, I’m not going the same way you are. I’ll see you later.”

She winked at me.

I wanted to walk with Ryan; I wanted to know why what I said was so wrong. But I really didn’t want him mad at me.

“Um, Kim I’m going the same way with you remember? You promised you’d show me around,”  I looked at Ryan. “I don’t want you to go out of your way and make you late.”

 “But I want to…” He said now looking a little bit sad.

 “I…” I didn’t know what to say.

 “I get it. It’s fine.” He said looking at his shoes. “I’ll see you around.”

He grabbed his backpack and walked out the door. I looked at Kim, she nodded at me. It was like she knew what I was thinking. I grabbed my bag and ran out the door.

 “Ryan wait!” I yelled at him.

He stopped, turned around and stared at me.

 “I’m sorry.” I started down at my feet, took a deep breath, and then walked to him.

Kim walked out of the room and told us she was going to class so we can talk.

 “Why are you sorry?” Ryan asked.

 “Because…” I looked around.

 “Look, I need more time. Can you please talk to me after school?”

I pulled out a pen and wrote my cell number on his hand.

 “Call me when school ends so we can talk.”

I looked at him, gave a half smile and walked the other direction. I was going to PE which would give me time to think things out. I had a bad feeling but I wasn’t sure how it would go. I also wasn’t sure I’d be able to find my PE class, I hate being the new kid.

Chapter 4: New Start

I was so excited, I basically ran into my English class. To my surprise Kim was in my class which was great because I had a lot to tell her.

“Ello, how’s your day going?”

“Oh my god, dude! It’s freaking awesome!”

“Why? I mean like what happened?”

“Well I had History first and I sat next to this guy named Spencer Smith which is Ryan’s best friend. But that’s not the best part.”

“Go on.”

“And then I had math next and guess who was in it?”

“Ryan?”

“Exactly! And we were talking the whole time. It was great, he’s amazing. But he has a girlfriend.”

I said sliding down my seat.

“Well…”

Kim trailed off.

“Well what?”

“I mean obviously he must at least be interested in you.”

“Oh don’t get my hopes up.”

“I’m not trying to, but I mean think about it. Was he really trying to get to know you?”

“Well I guess, when we left he said I had pretty eyes.”

“There you go!”

I shrugged.

I started thinking about it, maybe he did like me.

“Ask Spencer tomorrow what he thinks.”

“Tomorrow!”

I really didn’t want to wait.

“Well if you’re that into this guy, there’s always lunch?”

“I’m not really into him. I mean I’m not one of those girls who falls in love with someone they just met.”

Which was completely true.

“And besides I don’t want to go talk to him alone.”

“Who said anything about you being alone?”

Kim said with a sly smile.

 I laughed and laid back. How was I able to change myself so quickly? How could I go from a completely quiet outcast to a cool new girl who people actually wanted to be friends with?

 After class was over, we ran to my locker.

“Where do they usually hang out?”

I said as I put my books away and grabbed a bag of cherries.

“Yummy!”

Kim said as I held the bag to her.

“Uh I think in the band room.”

I shut my locker and then we began walking to the band room. When we got there it was completely empty.

“That’s weird, they’re always here.”

She said sucking on a cherry pit.

I sighed in disappointment.

“Where could they be? Why aren’t they in the place they always are?”

I looked at Kim puzzled.

Ryan’s Point Of View

I never really tired to get to know the girls because at Ocean View High most of them were fake. But Megan seemed genuine and unique. Right when lunch began I walked all around campus looking for her.

“Dude, tell me why we’re not practicing again?”

Brendon said walking next to me.

“I just think we need a break.”

“Break?”

Brendon said in shock.

“You never let us take breaks, what’s really going on?”

I rolled my eyes.

“Okay there’s this new girl that I met today and I want to say hi to her. There are you happy now?”

“Is it Megan?”

Spencer said jumping into the conversation.

“Yeah, you know her?”

“I sit next to her in history. She totally likes you but I told her you already had a girlfriend so yeah. I think she’ll get the hint.”

“Why would you tell her that?”

“Because it’s true?”

He said looking at me weird.

“What about Britney?”

Jon asked but I know he really didn’t care; he just wanted to be part of the conversation.

“Well I mean I’ve only been going out with her for 2 weeks. It’s not like we’re soul mates or anything, besides I really don’t think she’s the girl for me.”

“You’re going to break up with the hottest girl in school?”

Brendon said looking at me like I was an idiot.

“Okay that’s like all she is. She’s not smart, interesting, or anything unique.”

“But she’s so hot, like the hottest girl ever!”

Jon said grabbing onto my shirt.

Just then I looked up and saw Megan walking with Kim, a girl from my science class.

“Not anymore.”

I said as I practically sprinted over to her.

“Hey Megan.”

She looked at me and smiled.

“Oh hey, I didn’t see you there. I also didn’t think I’d see you so soon, stalking me?”

She said with a playful smile.

“Oh, yeah well no I’m not. I was just walking with some friends and I say you and thought I should come by and say hi. So uhh hi.”

Wow I was really lame.

“Oh well thank you for taking time out of your busy day to greet me.”

She giggled.

Her laugh was adorable, I couldn’t help but smile.

“So, um, do you want to hand out with me and my friends? You totally don’t have to, I mean I want you to but I won’t get mad at you if you don’t want to. I mean it’s not going to kill me if you don’t want to, but I’m not saying I don’t care and umm…”

I couldn’t I just shut up!

I thought she would look at me like I was a loser and walk away but she didn’t. She looked at me with a smile and giggled as if she thought I was being cute.

“Sure I’d love to, but my friend Kim has to come too.”

“Of course.”

“But wait…”

She said stopping me.

“Don’t you have a girlfriend?”

“Well… I don’t think I like her anymore.”

“Really?! I mean oh, how come?”

She said trying to act like she wasn’t really interested but I knew she was.

“Yes, really. She’s just not the girl I’m looking for.”

We walked over to the guys, but do you honestly think it would be that easy? I hope not.

“George Ryan Ross!”

I turned around and of course, there’s Britney.

Megan’s Point Of View

“What are you doing? And how come you haven’t said a word to me today?”

Britney said with the meanest look I’d ever seen on someone’s face.

“I didn’t see you?”

“You liar!”

“Okay I didn’t know I had to.”

“You are my boyfriend!”

“About that…”

He trailed off.

“I don’t think we’re going to work out.”

“What?!”

She said in shock.

“No one has ever dumped me! Why do you want to break up and it better not be a bullshit reason.”

“I just think we should be friends.”

I just stood there next to Kim watching them fight. Well, at least I was until Britney told me otherwise.

Chapter 3: The Boy

“So…”

I said looking around.

“What goes on around here?”

“The usual.”

Kim shrugged.

“Over by the football field are the over sexually-active make out clique, underneath the bleachers are the stoners, nerds in the library, jocks by the benches, and cheerleaders running around with their big ass pom-poms.”

“Oh I didn’t know cheerleaders used pom-poms.”

“They don’t.”

We started laughing.

I was so glad I met Kim; she’s just like me except she knows how to have fun.

“So do you have a boyfriend?”

I asked.

“Yeah, right.”

“Why do you say that?”

“I don’t know, guys just don’t see me as girlfriend material.”

“But you’re gorgeous!”

Which was completely true.

“And apparently you have a great sense of humor.”

She said looking at me like I was insane.

“Well do you have crush.”

“Maybe.”

“Who?”

“Well… His name is Brendon. He’s so cute and talented. He can sing like an angel and play the piano so beautifully. But he doesn’t even know that I exist.”

“Well do you have any classes with him?”

“One.”

“Oh which one?”

“Biology.”

“Oh I’m sorry I made you miss him.”

“No it’s cool, I made a best friend.”

She said best friend right?

“Thanks.”

I said smiling. For once in my life I’d made an actual best friend.

“So do you have a boyfriend?”

She asked me.

“Ha, now you’re funny.”

“Well seen any cute guys?”

“I saw, well, meet this one gorgeous guy.”

“How?”

“Some girl bumped into my stuff down. So, when I was picking him up he handed me my notebook. He had an amazing smile.”

“Oh lala! What’s his name?”

“Ryan Ross I think?”

She started laughing.

“What?”

“Dude get in line. Everyone likes Ryan Ross. He’s Brendon’s best friend, and he is an amazing guitarist and lyric writer.”

“Is it bad that I like him?”

“No, not at all. He’s just someone who would be hard to be with because of all the girls. But maybe you can talk to him, he’s in our Biology class.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, he sits next to Brendon.”

Just then the bell rang.

“Well, In P.E. right now so I’ll see you at lunch.”

“Ugh, 3 whole classes.”

“I know it’s a drag, but don’t worry.”

I gave her a hug and continued my day as the new student. My next class was history with Ms. Rios, hopefully this won’t be too bad.

“Please take a seat by Spencer Smith.”

“Which one is that?”

I said looking around.

“That would be the one with the headphones and drumsticks who’s not listening!”

She said raising her voice.

“Thanks.”

I walked over and sat next to him.

“Hi.”

I said to him, but I didn’t get a response. So either he couldn’t hear me or he was just ignoring me, I hope it was the first one though. It took him 20 minutes for him to even realize I was sitting there.

“Hey are you new?”

“Yes.”

“Oh, you just get here?”

“I’ve been here since class started actually.”

“Oh my bad, I just had new beats that came into my head and I didn’t want to forget them.”

“Oh I see.”

Yeah.”

“So are you in band class or something?”

He laughed.

“No I’m in an actual band of my own with my 3 best friends.”

“Oh really? That’s so cool.”

“Yeah. It’s myself, my friend Brendon, my friend Jon, and my friend Ryan.”

“Ryan Ross?”

“Yeah, do you know him?”

“Not really, I dropped my notebook and he picked it up for me.”

“He did?”

He asked in amazement.

“Yeah why?”

“Oh well I mean Ryan’s a nice guy and helps people out, but he doesn’t usually do that for girls. He hates how they always drop something to hit on him.”

“Wow.”

Kim was right, apparently everyone wanted him.

“Yeah but he must at least think you’re cute.”

That made me smile.

“Too bad he has a girlfriend.”

And of course that made me frown.

Just then the bell rang.

“Well it was cool meeting you. Maybe I’ll see you around?”

“You can count on it.”

I said with a smirk.

He smiled and we went our separate ways.

“Ugh, Algebra.”

I said to myself.

I walked in slowly but thankfully the teacher was by the door so I didn’t have to ask the stupid usual new kid stuff.

“Welcome, have a seat anywhere.”

I walked in and sat in an empty seat next another empty seat, that way I wouldn’t be distracted. Math was my best subject and I really wanted to pay attention, but of course the way my day was going, that wasn’t going to happen.

“Mr. Ross you’re late yet again.”

“Sorry.”

I looked up and saw him. I was ecstatic that he was in my class but why did it have to be this one? But surely enough once he saw me he picked the seat right next to me.

“Wow Mr. Ross, I’m surprised you’re not in the back like usual.”

That had to have meant something right?

“Hey, Megan right?”

“Yeah that’s me.”

I said copying notes. I was trying to act casual so it wouldn’t look like I was totally drooling over him.

“Well at least that’s more than what you said to me last time.

“Yeah sorry about that. You know, it was my first day and you just…”

And then I stopped.

I didn’t want to hit on him for 2 reasons. The first one because of what Spencer told me and the second one because I really didn’t know how to.

“I what?”

“You just came out of nowhere and freaked me out a bit.”

“Oh… Sorry.”

He said looking a little disappointed.

“Oh no it’s fine, at least I know someone in math now.”

I said with a smile.

He smiled back; he had such a cute smile.

So instead if my plan to pay attention in that class, I talked to Ryan. But I can’t really complain, I liked it. It felt like time went so fast because before I knew it the bell rang.

“That sucks.”

He said.

“Why?”

“Oh because we just started to get to know each other. Well, can I see you at lunch?”

“If you can find me.”

I winked.

He laughed.

“Alright bye.”

But before I left he turned back around.

“Oh and by the way, your eyes are really pretty.”

And then he walked in the other direction. I pulled out my mirror and that’s when I noticed… My eyes were green.

Chapter 2: Speaking Voice?

 I walked to the office because I didn’t get my schedule yet. The secretary was typing very fast from what I’ve seen before.

“Here you go, room 202 is your next class. Do you know how to get there?”

She smiled.

The sad part is she actually meant it. I mean blonde moment much? I’m a new student how the hell would I know where the hell that class would be.

“No I don’t.”

Just then a girl walked out, face tomato red screaming at the top of her lungs.

“All right! I won’t do it again!”

“Ah, Kimberly.”

The secretary said.

“It’s Kim.”

The girl said with her arms crossed.

“What class do you have?”

“Biology.”

“202?”

“Yes Pat, what’s with the questions? Am I being interrogated for something?”

“Take Ms. Elisabeth with you. She’s new and doesn’t know her way around school.”

“Fa’ sho.”

She said looking at me.

“Don’t worry Megan.”

She said with a warm smile.

“Kimberly doesn’t bite.”

I nodded and walked out, not even looking at the girl.

“Hey.”

She said catching up to me.

“Sorry about all that. I’m just not having a good day. Plus our biology teacher does not help at all. Such a bitch if I do say so myself.”

“Oh.”

“Megan right?”

I nodded.

“I’m Kim.”

I just nodded again.

“Not very talkative I’m guessing?”

I nodded.

“Why not?”

I just shrugged.

“Oh well maybe when we get to know each other better you’ll tell me.”

She said with a half smile. I tried giving her a half smile but it didn’t exactly work.

“I… um… I like your H.I.M shirt.”

Wow how lame am I?

“Thanks! I love them, do you like them?”

I nodded.

“Are they your favorite band?”

“No.”

“Oh.”

“Fall Out Boy is.”

“Oh that’s rad.”

I smiled.

We arrived at the classroom but I didn’t walk in.

“What are you doing?”

She said looking at me in confusion.

I just stood there, not saying a single word.

She sighed.

“Come with me.”

She took me by the hand and walked me into the girls’ bathroom. She made sure no one was in the stall and then took a seat on the couch next to the blue wall. This must be a rich school.

“I know I don’t know you and you don’t know me well, but I think we are similar some ways. See, I’m not a people person myself either and that’s why I’m always in the office. Instead of no talking I get lashed out with anger and pain. We are both in pain, I really don’t know yours but I’m hear to listen if you want to talk.”

I thought to myself. Should I let her in? Should I actually try to keep a friend? I took a deep breath and walked over to her.

“I don’t like talking… But I write.”

I pulled out my journal from my backpack.

“It’s big, I’ve written in it since I was 13 years old.”

I handed it to her.

She started reading it then stood up.

“I shutter at the thought of him. How he left me and with what, is it a lot? Not at all to my soul. I cry with the blade in my hands. I can see his face in the reflection of the knife. He is sad with me for what I’ve done to myself. He hurts as he feels me hurt. It feels the blood run down my wrist…”

 She looked at me then flipped to another page within the book.

“I hid inside with a lock on my door. Buried in my hands, I’m dying on the floor. He pounds on my door, I hide. He came bursting through, I cried. He pushed me down and held me close. He whispered to me, "Don’t worry, I’ll make you so happy baby.”

She shut the book and walked to me.

“You must have a step-father?”

I nodded.

“And your dad… He passed away?”

“I guess you could say that.”

“Well I don’t have a dad either. Well I mean I suppose I do, but he left me when I was little. I don’t even remember him or anything about him. And of course, there’s my alcoholic mother…”

She trailed off.

“After my dad, well Tom as I call him because I really can’t call him dad, left she completely shut down.”

“Does she like, you know, hit you?”

“Only when she’s in a good mood. Most of the time I was lucky if I just got that.”

She rolled her sleeves up and showed me 2 big burn marks on her wrists.

“She used to do that with her cigarettes, that’s why you’ll never see me wearing short-sleeves or no jacket.”

“Wow…”

“Yeah, that’s why I understand your pain.”

“It’s just… hard you know? I don’t even talk to my own mother. I haven’t said more than a few words in years. Plus, people never like me or try to understand me.”

She nodded.

“I get it. Well… I’m already in enough trouble. Let’s get to class.”

Just then the bell rang.

“Never mind, let’s go to break.”

She laughed.

I laughed back and stood up.

“This school isn’t that bad.”

“Yeah well that’s because you just got here. There is so much drama. There’s a good part to it though.”

“Oh and what is that?”

“Boys!”

We laughed.

I already had one in mind, the gorgeous boy from before. But before I got too over my head, I wanted to see how it all goes.

Shotgun, Wedding

Chapter 1: The Beginning

 I stared out the window watching the sun slowly rise. I’d been waiting to get out of this hell hole you call a home. As a 17 year old life is pretty hard, but hard just doesn’t seem to explain it quite well enough. Most 17 year olds’ don’t wish they were dead, I’ been wishing this for the past 4 years. After my father’s death when I was 8 years old, it felt like a part of me dead with him. About 3 years after that my mother decided to get remarried to Luke Simons. My mother never knew how much I hated him. It wasn’t just the fact that he would be replacing my father, no, it was more than that. But my mother seemed happy so I couldn’t tell her what he did to me.

 I finished putting on some clothes I was able to find, most of them were in boxes by my door. See, I’d just moved from Venice, California to Las Vegas last month. Did I care to move? Surprisingly, not really. After my dad died I stopped talking to my friends. I kept to myself, never told a secret to a single soul. I was able to maintain the highest grades in all my classes. As you can probably guess I don’t have a boyfriend, never have. I wouldn’t consider myself pretty but I did get better as I aged into my teenage years. I have dark hair with platinum blonde highlights and I have fair skin even though I am mostly Mexican. My eyes were brown but they turned green when I became happy, which meant my eyes were never green.

“Time for school.” My mother shouted from downstairs.

I took one last glance in the mirror just to make sure I looked decent. I had on light Demin jeans, a black short-sleeves t-shirt, and of course my usual black and white low top converses. I grabbed my chain my father gave me before he died. He told me as long as I wear it, he’ll always be with me. It’s weird, it’s like he knew it was going to happen. On the chain there was a sliver heart locket with a picture of him.

“I’m scared dad.” I said to the picture with a frown.

“Megan get down here now! You don’t want to be late to your new school.”

My mother said it as if she really thought I wanted to go. Of course I didn’t want to go, I didn’t like meeting new people. My junior year my 7^th school in my whole life time wouldn’t exactly be easy. I grabbed my book bag and my Levi jacket I got for Christmas last year, and then started down the stairs.

“Honey, wouldn’t you rather wear ink instead of black? What about that plaid skit I got you last weekend?”

“No.”

“I have a floral jacket you can wear.”

“No.”

“You know, that’s all you ever say now.”

“I’m sorry.”

“Would you like me to give you a ride to school?” Luke asked as he walked into the kitchen.

“No.”

I said looking away

My mother sighed.

“Well, do you need money for gas in your car?”

“No. Bye.”

I grabbed a muffin and walked out the door. I didn’t need money because I still had $100 left from my job back in Venice at a gift shop. I pull up to the new high school I would be attending and decided I’d walk there instead of driving in. I made a quick U-turn and parked 2 blocks away. I casually walked all the way to the front of Ocean View High.

“Watch where you’re going loser.” Some girl said to me right before knocking my stuff down to the floor.

“Great. Just what I needed.” I mumbled to myself.

I guess I didn’t shut my bag all the way because everything fell out all over the floor. I bent down to grab everything quickly so no one would notice. But of course everyone did and as they walked by they laughed. But they didn’t just laugh, they pointed to. Awesome for a first day right?

“Here.”

I turned around and saw the cutest boy I’d ever seen. I couldn’t even say anything, all I did was stare like an idiot.

“Um, I’m pretty sure it’s yours?”

“Oh, thank you.”

I grabbed my notebook and started walking away.

“So what’s your name?” He asked kindly.

“Oh, um, Megan.”

“No last name?”

“Elisabeth.”

“Pretty.”

“Thank you.”

“Well I’m Ryan. Ryan Ross.”

“Hello.”

“Not very talkative huh?”

I shook my head.

“Oh well I understand, you must be new.”

“Yes.”

“Well, welcome.” He said with a smile.

“See you around.”

I just nodded.

As he walked away I couldn’t help but watch. I never liked people very much and I didn’t want to get to know anyone here. But maybe this year could be different. Maybe I could actually fit in and open up a little bit. Stop worrying about my past and my troubles. For once in my life, maybe, I could live.

Chapter 43: Is This The End Of Us?

He walked out into the living room where Kim was.

Kim: Brendon… I…

Brendon: No I need to tell you something.

Kim: No Brendon I do… I don’t want this anymore. Neither of us do.

Ryan: Neither?

Megan: Yes. Neither.

Brendon and Ryan looked at eachother.

Megan: You guys are so young. You have your rockstar life to live. Kim and I can’t be in the way anymore.

Ryan: Megan you’re not in the way.

Brendon: Neither are you Kim, I love you.

Tears feel into Kim’s eyes.

Kim: I love you too, but…

She took Brendon by the hands.

Kim: But I can’t.

Megan gave Ryan a hug.

Megan: We’ve realized we can’t do this. Let you live your lives like this. Ryan I love you so much but I want you to have a life you could live and I don’t think that is me.

Megan and Kim ran into their rooms and packed all their stuff.  They put all their stuff into one car.

Megan walked about into the house and looked at Ryan.

Ryan: Megan, I love you.

He said crying.

Megan held his face softly in his hands.

Megan: I know baby, I know. But I need you to be happy.

Ryan: You make me happy.

Megan ran out crying.

Kim didn’t even have enough guts to talk to Brendon.

So there they went, Kim and Mandy drove off to live their new lifes.

It’s 2008 now. Panic! At the Disco have just written a new album, they are now very successful. But they are not happy. Kim and Mandy work for Kerrang magazine, they are also successful and also unhappy. They haven’t seen eachother in over a year. They always wonder what would happy if they’d stayed together. But none of them had the courage to find one another, until now.

Kim: It’s been a year Meg.

Megan: I know.

Kim: We can’t just show up after leaving them like that.

Megan: I know.

Kim: Megan… I’m scared.

Megan looked at Kim.

Megan: Me too.

They walked to their dressing room.

Kim: Knock.

Megan: No. You knock.

Just then the door opened. It was Spencer who looked like he’d just seen a ghost.

Megan: Hello Spencer.

Spencer: I… Megan? Kim?

Kim didn’t want to look or speak to him, but she needed to let the past go.

Kim: Can we come in.

Spencer opened the door and moved out of the way.

Spencer: Guys…

Brendon and Ryan turned around.

Ryan: Yeah?

He saw Megan and fell off the chair. Megan couldn’t help but laugh.

He stood up and slowly walked over to her.

Megan: Hi Ryan.

Ryan: What are you… What are you doing here?

Megan: Can we go somewhere and talk?

Ryan grabbed her, he didn’t want to waste any time. They walked into another room.

Megan: So… How’ve you been?

Ryan just looked at her.

Ryan: Not good.

Megan frowned.

Ryan: Why did you leave me?

Megan: I thought it would be best for your career.

Ryan: It wasn’t. It was the worst thing ever.

Megan: I know…

She said walking around in a circle.

Megan: I’ve been in pain everyday since I left. I don’t know what to do anymore.

Kim’s P.O.V.

Kim: Brendon… Can I talk to you?

He stood up and walked over to her.

Brendon: About what?

Kim: I know you’re mad at me. But please.

Jon: Umm… Spencer lets go.

He nodded and walked out.

Spencer knew he couldn’t do anything anymore, he wasn’t hers and he’d have to live with that. He just wanted both of them happy.

Brendon: What are you doing here?

Kim: It’s been a year, I didn’t know how hard it would be.

Brendon: It wasn’t easy on me either.

Kim: I know. I’m sorry. I’m not telling you to forgive me. I just wanted to tell you how sorry I am and…

She looked at him and saw frustration in his eyes.

Brendon: And what?

Kim: And… And I have to go.

She said as she turned to walk out the door but Brendon caught her by the wrist.

Brendon: Kim it’s been a year but I know you better than that. Tell me.

Kim looked at his with tears.

Kim: And I’m still in love with you.

Brendon had this look on his face that couldn’t be described in words.

Kim fell into his arms and started crying. Brendon held her close and kissed the top of her head, he whispered in her ear.

Brendon: I’m still in love with you too.

Kim looked into his eyes. He smiled at her and she smiled back. Then after a year they shared a passionate kiss.

Megan’s P.O.V

Megan: I probably should get going.

Ryan: Why did you come?

Megan: I needed to see you, I wanted to hear your voice.

Both had tears in their eyes.

Ryan: Megan…

She looked at him.

Megan: Yes?

Ryan: Are you still in love with me?

Megan looked at him and started to cry even more.

Megan: Yes, yes I am Ryan. I never stopped loving you.

Ryan just stared at her, tears filled his cheeks. He ran to her and kissed her as if nothing had ever changed. She pulled away too look at him in confusion.

Ryan: I never stopped loving you either. You are the only one for me, the only one I’ll ever love. The only one I’ll ever need. I love you Megan.

From then on their life was perfect. Ryan and Megan married in 2008 on August 25, Brendon and Kim married in 2009 on June 28. The Ross’s have 2 beautiful girls. The Urie’s have one little boy and a baby girl. Spencer married his wife Stacey on September 20^th, in 2010 and Jon married Rachel on March 12, 2011. Panic At the Disco are still writing music and are one of the most famous bands in the world. Megan and Kim now own their one magazine called Rock Band Weekly. They love their lives and wouldn’t change it for the world.

Chapter 42: Why did I fall for you?

Kim’s P.O.V

The next morning I woke up with a headache. What the fuck happened that night. Just then I felt a movement behind me. Then I remember, Brendon. I couldn’t believe it, it was real. He wrapped his strong arms around me and softly kissed my shoulder. I couldn’t help but smile. I adjusted my body to where I was looking at him directly in the eye. He gave me a warm smile.

Brendon: Hey.

I smiled back.

Kim: Hi.

I wasn’t even thinking because I knew if I did I would ruin everything. Plus I would be worrying a lot. I just wanted to be with him, I knew he was the one, my only, and my one true love.

My P.O.V

Where the hell could they be? They’d been gone all night with not even so much as a phone call! I hate being like their mom but I’ve acted like it since we were in Jr. High. I hope something didn’t happen to them. I couldn’t even sleep a wink, Ryan tried to convince me to but I just couldn’t. And then there was Spencer.

Ryan: Babe, come to bed please.

Me: I can’t… With everything that happened tonight, I mean… Why can’t everything be perfect?

Ryan: The world’s not a perfect place, Meg.

I blankly stare out the window.

Me: I’m going to get something to drink, to calm my nerves.

I got out of bed and walked to the door.

Ryan: Hey…

I turned around and looked at him.

Ryan: Love you.

I smiled.

Me: Love you too.

I walked into the kitchen and flipped on the switch.

Me: What are you doing?

I said as I walked over to Spencer he was laying head down on the table.

Spencer: How could I let this happen?

Me: Beats me.

Spencer: Megan.

He whined.

I got a glass of orange juice and sat across from him.

Spencer: I… I thought we’d be perfect.

Me: Nothing is perfect Spencer.

He looked at his glass of water and smiled.

Spencer: I remember… When you, Kim, Ryan, and I were in 8^th grade and all planned on getting married at the same time. And Brendon and Jon would marry us.

I laughed.

Me: Yeah, we had it all planned out. Then for our honeymoon we’d go to Paris. Where Kim and I always dreamed of going.

I look at him.

Me: But you know, things change and so do people.

Spencer: I really wanted her to be with one.

Me: I know.

Spencer: Do you think I have any chance of getting her back?

I stared at him for a while, and it felt like, by not answering, he knew what I was going to say.

Me: Get some rest. I’m sure she’ll be back by tomorrow.

He looked up at me.

Spencer: If you were her, would you?

Me: I’m not Kim…

I got up and went back to the room; I closed my eyes as if that was going to make the sun come up faster.

Kim’s P.O.V.

As we up and got dressed there was a bit of awkward between us. When I got done I sat on the bed and looked at my black pumps I’d got a Shell's.

Brendon: Kim…

He said as he took a sit next to me on the bed, placing his hand over my right knee.

Kim: What are we going to do?

Brendon: I don’t know…

Kim: I mean Spencer and I have been together forever. You and Spencer are best friends and band mates. And we’re best friends.

He looked up at me.

Brendon: Maybe… That’s the way things should stay.

I looked at him.

Brendon: Come here.

He pulled me in close and gave me an “I love you no matter what” hug.

Kim: Come on; let’s go back to the house.

Brendon’s P.O.V.

Once we got back to the house no one said a word. Kim went straight to her room with Megan following and I went to Ryan in his room.

Ryan: Dude how could you let that happen? Do you regret it?

Brendon: Of course I don’t. You know how much I love her.

Ryan: I know, but Brendon… What’s best for her?

I looked up.

Ryan: I mean do you honestly think she wants to just throw away all those years she’s spent with Spencer?

Brendon: He should have thought about that before he fucked someone else.

Ryan: So sleeping with her made everything better?

I was breathing heavily.

Ryan: Brendon, think about Kim. What do you think is best for her?

I looked away. All I wanted was for her to be happy. I knew what I had to do.

Chapter 40: This is tough, with one love lost

Kim’s P.O.V

My head was spinning like crazy. I honestly did not know what I was doing at that moment. I was shocked by my actions yet… I thought it was the right thing to do. It was mystical but then my heart came back into reality. I pulled away and looked at Brendon.

Brendon: I… I’m sorry I didn’t…

I couldn’t answer, I couldn’t move, I couldn’t speak.

Kim: No I’m sorry I was… I have to go.

I got up and left the room.

I walked down the hall and out the front door.

Megan: Kim!

She said called after me.

Kim: Meg, I’m fine really. I just need some air.

I continued to walk down the street to this near by park. I know it’s bad to go to a park at night but at that point I really didn’t care. I walked over to a swing and starting thinking. Spencer or Brendon? I think I love them both. Is it possible to be in love with two people at the same time? Spencer’s been in my heart for so long but he just cheated on me. And Brendon’s always been my best friend and now he tells me he loves me. But do I really want to risk our friendship for something that might not last? I looked up at the sky, as tears feel from my eyes I knew… I knew with this decision my life would surely change.

Brendon’s P.O.V

What did I just do? I confessed my love for Kim and kissed her, it felt good yet it felt like I was messing everything up. I got up and walked out of the room and who happens to be in the hallway? That’s right, Spencer.

Spencer: Dude what’s happening?

Brendon: You just cheated on Kim with Shannon!

Spencer: What? You’re crazy.

Brendon: No you are.

I said pushing him.

Spencer: Fucking Brendon, don’t touch I have a headache.

Brendon: That’s not as bad as what’s going to happen to you now.

Megan: Whoa! Stop!

She said going between us.

Jon’s P.O.V

I walked into the kitchen to get away from everyone. I saw two cups on the table and decided to clean them.

Jon: What the hell?

I looked in one of the glasses and saw white stuff in it.

I walked to where everyone was yelling to see if anyone knew what it was.

Jon: Hey! Hey! Look.

I showed them the stuff.

Ryan: what’s going on?

Megan: I think its drugs.

Spencer: That’s it!

He said grabbing the glass.

Spencer: Shannon put it in there when we were talking in the kitchen. I told her it tasted funny but she just told me to keep drinking it.

Megan: So you didn’t purposely cheat on Kim?

Spencer: Why would I cheat on her, I love her with all my heart.

Kim: You do?

Everyone turned to see Kim standing behind us.

Kim’s P.O.V

Spencer: Yes, I love you so much. I never want to hurt you.

I looked over at Brendon who was staring at the ground.

Kim: But you still cheated on me.

Spencer: She drugged me, Kim you have to believe I’d never hurt you.

I looked at Megan who looked at Brendon who was still staring at the ground.

Megan: You guys lets give them some time to talk.

My P.O.V

Jon, Brendon, Ryan, and I walked into the living room. Brendon looked like a total zombie.

Me: Brendon are you ok?

Brendon looked up.

Brendon: Hm? Oh yeah.

Me: What happened in the room?

Brendon: A lot.

Me: Like?

Brendon: I told her I loved her and then we… Kissed.

Everyone gasped.

Me: Oh my god, why?

Brendon: I don’t know, it just happened.

Kim’s P.O.V

Kim: Spencer…

Spencer: Kim, no please. I didn’t mean to. I love you so much; I want to be with you the rest of my life.

Kim: When I found you in the room with Shannon I freaked. Brendon took me into his room and we talked. Then he told me he loved me and we kissed.

Spencer just looked at me; I could see his eyes fill up with tears as were mine.

Spencer: What? You… You cheated on me?

Kim: I wouldn’t exactly call it cheating since I didn’t jump into the sack with him unlike you.

Spencer: I was drugged, I didn’t do it on purpose. What’s your excuse?

Kim: I FOUND YOU IN BED WITH ANOTHER WOMAN! You think I was thinking clearly!

Spencer: So you’re telling me you don’t have any feelings for Brendon?

I looked away. I couldn’t answer it because I knew I did I have feelings for him.

Spencer: You do, don’t you?

Kim: I… I do. I’m not going to lie to you. I loved you but this isn’t the first time you cheated on me.

Spencer: You have feelings for my best friend.

Kim: We’re hurting each other.

Spencer: But we love each other, all we need is trust.

Kim: But that’s the thing Spencer, we don’t have trust.

Spencer: How can we be together without trust?

I looked at him and then at the floor. A silent tear rolled down my cheek. I walked over to the door and opened it. I turned around and looked at Spencer who had tears rolling down his face. I quietly yet loud enough for him to hear spoke the words I thought I would never say.

Kim: We can’t be.

I walked out the door, closing it behind me.

Chapter 39: Looks Can Be Deceiving

MY P.O.V
Days turned into weeks and before I knew it my little cousin Shannon was here.

Shannon: Megan!

Me: Hey you! You’ve gotten so big!

Shannon: Haha, thanks. So my mom said you had a surprise for me?

Me: Kim! Bring the guys.

Kim came walking out followed by Ryan, Brendon, Jon, Spencer, and even Pete who came by just to hang out for a while.

Shannon was in shock.

Shannon: OH MY GOD!!! PANIC! AT THE DISCO AND PETE WENTZ!

Me: I know unbelievable right?

Shannon: Unreal!

Me: Well Ryan is my Fiancée.

Shannon: Ryan? The Ryan Ross?

Me: Yup.

Shannon: OH MY GOD!

Me: I know.

Shannon: Is Spencer taken?

She said looking at him.

Spencer: Yes I am. By this beautiful girl over here.

He walked over to Kim and wrapped his arms around her.

Kim: Hi I'm Kim.

Shannon: Kim...

She said looking at her with attitude but then she looked at her with a smile.

Shannon: Great to meet you all. Megan where is my room?

Me: Oh over here, I'll show you.

Shannon: Excuse us.

Then we walked down the hall into her room where she would be staying.

Me: Here is your room, its right across from mine and Spencer's and Kim's right next to yours on the left.

Shannon: Thanks so much for letting me come down and visit you.

Me: No problem Hun. Let me know if you need anything ok?

Shannon: Ok thank you but I think I'll be fine. I'm going to get some rest.

Me: Alright, I'll be in the living room.

Shannon: Ok.

Me: Bye.

Shannon: Bye.

Shannon's P.O.V

I finally got to meet Panic! At the Disco, it was like a dream come true. But I couldn't believe Spencer, my one true love, had a slutty girlfriend. Well... It's not like she'd stop me from getting him, I always learn from my favorite cousin. No not Megan.... Kelsey.

Shannon: We'll see who gets who.

My P.O.V

Me: Ryan!

 I said running over to the couch and jumped on Ryan.

Ryan: Whoa!

He laughed.

Ryan: Why so excited babe?

I laughed.

Me: I don't know, I just saw you and I just wanted to be with you.

He smiled and gave me a kiss on the side of my head.

Ryan: Well I love you and I'll always be with you.

I smiled and gave him a kiss on the lips.

Kim: Hey hey! We don't need to see anymore action.

We laughed.

Kim: Want to go out to eat?

Me: Yes ma'am!

Ryan: I'm in.

Kim: Ok so it's everyone, Brendon, Pete, and Jon want to go too. What about Shannon?

Me: Hey Shannon!

I yelled.

A few seconds later she came running out.

Shannon: Yeah?

Me: We're all going out to eat, you want to come?

Shannon: Oh uh...

Spencer: Actually not everyone. I think I'm going to stay here.

Kim: Are you sure babe?

Spencer: I'm beat.

Kim: Alright, I'll bring you something back.

Spencer: Thanks sweetheart.

Me: So are you coming, Shannon?

Shannon: Oh no, I'm still worn out.

Me: Ok then. We'll all leave in 15 minutes.

Shannon's P.O.V.

Perfect, it was time to put my plan into motion. After everyone left I ran to my room and then walked into the kitchen where Spencer was.

Shannon: Hi Spencer.

Spencer: Hey Shannon, it's nice to meet you.

Shannon: Likewise.

Spencer: Are you excited to stay here?

Shannon: Ecstatic.

I smiled.

Shannon: Do you want something to drink?

Spencer: Oh you don't have to get me anything.

Shannon: It's my pleasure.

Spencer: Well we have some soda in there.

Shannon: I'll get us some.

Spencer: Alright.

He smiled to me.

I got a can of soda and got 2 glasses. I poured mine and then Spencer but I put a little something special in Spencer's drink.

Shannon: Here you go.

Spencer: Thank you very much.

Shannon: No problem.

He took a drink.

Spencer: This tastes a little funny.

Shannon: Oh mine does too but I'm sure it'll get better.

Spencer: Yeah...

He said looking at the glass but took another drink right after.

Shannon: So what's it like to be a big rock star?

Spencer: Haha, well we're doing what we love to do so nothing to complain about.

Shannon: Isn't it hard? Especially in your relationship?

Spencer: Kim is great, she understands.

Shannon: Is she the one you really want?

Spencer: Oh yes, I'm going to purpose to her after Megan and Ryan's wedding.

Shannon: Not if I can help it.

I muttered.

Spencer: I'm sorry I didn't catch that?

Shannon: I said I hope it works out.

Spencer: Oh thank you.

He looked at the cup again.

Spencer: I don't think I'll drink it anymore, something's weird about it.

I started faze one. I started crying, I even gave tears.

Spencer: Oh my god what's wrong?

Shannon: Oh it's my boyfriend. He just broke up with me.

Spencer: Why?

Shannon: I'm not the girl he's looking for I guess.

Spencer: Well you deserve better than him.

Shannon: Really?

Spencer: Yeah, you seem great and you're gorgeous.

Shannon: Oh you're just saying that.

Spencer: No really, I'm sure any guy would be happy to have you.

He grabbed his head.

Spencer: You know what... I think I'm going to go lay down.

Shannon: Ok.

He got up and started walking down the hall. I smiled to myself and chased after him.

Shannon: Oh Spencer...

He turned around, as soon as he did I jumped all over him and started making out with him.

Spencer: What are you doing?

Shannon: Shh... Don't fight it. Besides, my drugs should kick in about now. Not that you'll remember ever taking any.

I laughed.

Spencer: No, I love Kim.

Shannon: Not tonight.

I continued making out with him and took him into the bedroom where we'll have some real fun. I'll let your guy's imaginations think of all the dirty stuff we'll be doing.

Kim's P.O.V

Dinner was great, but I wish Spencer was there.

Kim: I'll be right back; I'm going to check on Spencer.

I walked down the hallway into the bed room.

Kim: Babe I brought you....

I was in total shock when I looked inside. I dropped the food.

Shannon: Oh hello Kim.

My eyes swelled up.

Kim: Spence- Spencer?

Spencer: Kim? What are you doing there? You should be in bed with me.

He said sounding confused. He had to have been drunk.

Kim: Oh my... OH MY GOD! I can't... How could you! I love you! You...

I couldn't even breathe. I felt so... Helpless.

I ran out into the living room where everyone was.

Megan: Kim? Kim what happened?!?

Kim: Spencer... You're cousin...

I just broke down on the floor.

Megan: He cheated on you???!?!?

I just kept crying.

Megan: Brendon carry her into your room.

He nodded, picked me up, and took me to his room.

My P.O.V.

I ran straight to the room where I saw Spencer basically dead asleep and Shannon putting on her clothes.

Shannon: Hey cousin.

Me: What the hell were you thinking?!?!

Shannon: Rock star, hello!

I couldn't believe it, I was speechless.

Me: You're not staying here. Only over night. I want you go tomorrow. I'm going to call your mother.

She walked passed me and went to her room. I hope Kim was alright, what could have come over Spencer? I couldn't believe it. I walked back into the living room; I thought it would be better for Brendon to talk to Kim.

 Brendon's P.O.V

Spencer had to have been on some hard drugs or drunk or something to do that to Kim.

Brendon: There has to be an explanation.

Kim wouldn't stop crying, not that I expected her to.

Kim: I just... How could he do this to me, I love him so much.

I grabbed Kim and held her tight so she would know I was there for her. I gave her a kiss on the top of her head and started talking to her until she calmed down, which of course she never did.

Kim: Thank god I have you Brendon. Even though you hated me in school. You know.... I used to have a huge crush on you.

Brendon: Really?

Kim: Yeah.

Brendon: How come you never told me?

Kim: I did, you laughed and said, " Haha yeah right Kimberly."

Brendon: I thought you were kidding.

Kim: Nope, I was serious.

Brendon: Oh. Shit...

Kim: What?

Brendon: Nothing.

Kim: Well... That's why I went out with Spencer because you didn't like me.